we're captive on the carousel of time

oh, I just love my boys so much. this is such a precious time and I do try my very best to embrace these days. It's so easy to let the day slip away DOING stuff and miss the sweetness of the moment. I thank God for giving me the gift, a mindful attitude toward the present, the "now." A few days ago Tyler fell asleep in my arms while I was rocking him...a rarity to be certain! It was nap time and he wanted me to hold him, so I sat on the little comfy chair in his room and rocked away. Slowly, he became heavier and heavier in my arms until our breathing matched each other and sleep came upon him. I started to get up, but decided to stay a bit longer...the laundry can wait, it will always be there. The kitchen floor can wait to be wiped, the dirt will be back tomorrow anyway and all the other things "calling my name" so loudly were silenced. I looked at the pictures surrounding me, the picture of me holding him just days after he was born....so tiny. And now, 1005 days later, so BIG in my arms. My eyes well up just thinking about it. Lord, please help me to number my days, (OUR days) that I may gain a heart of wisdom. I love this picture, Luke is such a ham and Tyler is loving every moment of it!

Now, let us not be fools and think that my days are filled with sunshine and laughter. They are hard, sometimes the entire week is hard...tiring, long, exhausting, and frustrating. But, I have found that the more days I get into THEIR world go a lot better then the days I spend PUTTING them into MINE! Yes, there are things to be done and projects to be completed, but my babies are neither one of those. Sometimes it's just CrAzY around here and I have to give into that and laugh and "roll with it" as it were. Letting go is a good thing, a necessary thing, a character thing. "Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so." ~Mary Jean Iorn Yes, these "normal days", they are blessings...in all their loud, dirty, hungry, whining ways...they are gifts!

"Sixteen springs and sixteen summers gone now
Cartwheels turn to car wheels thru the town
And they tell him,Take your time, it won't be long now
Till you drag your feet to slow the circles down
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game."
~Joni Mitchell, "Circle Game"~