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Saturday, February 25, 2012

i want to bake a cake and have a baby.

call me crazy, but i get so excited when i think about going into labor.  just the entire birthing process is such an amazing miracle to be apart of, to watch unfold within yourself. to experience the powerful, beautiful and sometimes frightening transition of bringing a baby into the world.  makes me feel so warm and cozy when i think about it, when i remember our past three home births, and i'm not saying it wasn't painful....it was....my rose colored glasses aren't that shaded!!!  


tonight is a chilly, blustery night.
the wind is howling and the fire is roaring and i'm awake with heartburn and project ideas, (have to stop "pinning" and eating so late). 


But my mind is seeing fireflies and feeling the thick, cool grass under my feet.  Lovie is due the end of june so if all goes as planned, (and i recognize that it may not).
i can walk around outside, (hopefully under the guise of night) and work through the contractions.  that's my desire, but we trust our life and this life into a Greater Hand.  
"In his heart a man plans his course, 
but the LORD/Yahweh/Jehovah, 
determines his steps."  
proverbs 16:9
we pray for LIFE, however he or she arrives.  sometimes i think i'm crazy when i re-read some of the sentences typed out, but they are truth to me.  

a friend of mine sent me the video posted below a few weeks ago.  it was the start of my "nursery renovation inspiration."  dear man that i love, he's so gracious with me, (even though he would prefer keeping everything the same.....forever)!  he never quite knows what he'll come home to.  currently 3 out of our 3 bedrooms are being rearranged or redesigned in one degree or another!  never underestimate the need of a mother to get her nest in order.  it's just about out of hand, (losing sleep over my spinning ideas)!   it's still a ways off, (23 weeks along), but i know how fast the spring and summer months go and how we love being OUTSIDE so i'm working extra hard, (while the strength, energy and not-too-large-belly are at hand).  

ordered the paint for the nursery and to repaint the crib, just MAKING MYSELF FINISH THE OTHER ROOMS before starting ANOTHER project!  

Here's the video I was talking about, (AND I'M SORRY IF ANY GRAPHIC IMAGES POP UP AFTER THE VIDEO IS OVER....i wasn't sure how to post this OUTSIDE of youtube, but i'm pretty sure i cleared anything from popping up.....but just warning you)!  The video itself is ALL TASTEFULLY PHOTOGRAPHED so no worries there.  Things I love about this video:


{the music choices}.
{the kind-faced husband}.
{the nursery}.freeze-frame 1:03.....LOVES it!
{the kiddie pool}.
{the midwives who are seemingly completely unmoved by her labor}.

{the baking of the cake}.
{the moment they find out it's a girl}. freeze frame 5:09
{wrinkly baby}.
{sister's first meeting}.
{the eating of the cake}.
{the peace}. 
   

So, with all that being said......I seriously want to bake a cake when I'm in labor, (you'll understand if you choose to watch the video)!  

Better head to bed now and rest this body and mind. Hope you have a refreshing weekend.  

{and a special shout-out to my friend Jeane' and her husband Curt enjoying their much anticipated anniversary "vacation"}!!

"Poor, dear, silly Spring, 
preparing her annual surprise!"
  ~Wallace Stevens~

1 comment:

Kara Stoltzfus said...

HOLLA!
Love that you stopped my blog, it's been ages!

Miss you friend, looking forward to next week!!
HUGS!

Praying for you & baby.
When i hear you say you are 23 weeks or when anyone says how far along they are, I often think of all my babies/experiences, but particularly Madelyn and how quickly she came and surprised us and she was "nameless" for a few hours. I think of the baby within you, comparing that baby to our small Maddie at birth (29 weeks) and the fulness of life each child holds!! I pray this baby stays inside your cozy home as long as able and I pray that whatever or however it happens you are graced with God's love & strength!